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[title] => „Najgore mi je kad me pitaju 'nešto za šug', ja ne znam ni što je šug, ni što valja od te vaše junetine i teletine!“
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Samoposluga na Poluotoku. Ima li poseban dio sa mesnicom? Ima! Odlično, ulazim.
Za pultom nema mesara. Čekam. Čekam… Strpljivo.
Konačno se odnekud sa stražnje strane pojavljuje mesar. Mlad. Naočit. Pun snage, malo zategnut od kojeg kilograma viška. Mesar, baš kakav treba biti. Nosi čistu bijelu kutu i na njoj pločicu s imenom. Martin. Sve štima. Martin me pita što želim.
- Junetinu, oko kila da bude. Samo mi je važno da je mekana.
Od kojeg ćete dijela? Od vrata?
- Ne znam… ne razumijem se… Samo da je mekano, svejedno od kojega je dijela...
Gospođo, 'oćete li od vrata, ili ćete od nečeg drugog? Vi recite, ja ću odsjeći.
- Ali svejedno mi je, vi znate što je mekše kad se skuha, za juhu je.
Aaaaa, evo je! Evo onih meni najdražih kupaca – odjednom gnjev prokulja iz Martina, nestade negdje onaj osmjeh s okruglog mladog lica. Stojim sa košarom. Grozničavo razmišljam čime sam ga naljutila. S onim da bude mekano?
Vi bi za juhu, je li? – sve je gnjevniji Martin.
Ti su mi najdraži! Dođe mi na primjer žena i kaže: „Dajte mi nešto za šug.“ Prvo, ja ne znam što je šug. Ja nisam odavde i ne znam što je šug. Recite na hrvatskom. Drugo, nikad u životu nisam pojeo ni jednu vrstu mesa osim svinjetine i piletine. Ma skoro samo svinjetinu. Nikada te neke junetine, teletine, ovo, ono… I kako da ja vaše prohtjeve riješim? Vi bi mekano, ona druga bi za „šug“, a sve junetina. Šta ja znam šta je mekano. Šta ja znam šta je za šug. A kad pitam hoćete li vrat, šutite. Što šutite? – izlila se iz mladog Martina (Slavonca?) ljutnja na prohtjeve Dalmatinke pred njegovim mesarskim pultom.
Stojim ukopano. Iz Martina bujica riječi, a iz mene ni riječ da izađe. Pretvorih se u krajnju skrušenost i poniženje zbog neznanja dijelova zaklane junadi porazbacane ispred mene na mesarskom pultu. Najradije bih nestala. No ta opcija podrazumijeva da ostajem bez mesa za ručak. Mekanog. Za juhu…
- Može onda od vrata… kilo… - neki eho mog glasa je dozujao do Martina, na čijem su se širokom licu tada opustili napeti mišići.
Eto, mogli ste odmah reći – zaključio je najljubazniji mesar na svijetu koji jede samo svinje.
Martin u Zadar, Martin iz Zadra. Ne ostavlja dojam da će naučiti dijelove juneta. Ni teleta. Ni što je šug. Zašto bi mesar uopće to trebao znati?!
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[cleanTitle] => „Najgore mi je kad me pitaju 'nešto za šug', ja ne znam ni što je šug, ni što valja od te vaše junetine i teletine!“
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Samoposluga na Poluotoku. Ima li poseban dio sa mesnicom? Ima! Odlično, ulazim.
Za pultom nema mesara. Čekam. Čekam… Strpljivo.
Konačno se odnekud sa stražnje strane pojavljuje mesar. Mlad. Naočit. Pun snage, malo zategnut od kojeg kilograma viška. Mesar, baš kakav treba biti. Nosi čistu bijelu kutu i na njoj pločicu s imenom. Martin. Sve štima. Martin me pita što želim.
- Junetinu, oko kila da bude. Samo mi je važno da je mekana.
Od kojeg ćete dijela? Od vrata?
- Ne znam… ne razumijem se… Samo da je mekano, svejedno od kojega je dijela...
Gospođo, 'oćete li od vrata, ili ćete od nečeg drugog? Vi recite, ja ću odsjeći.
- Ali svejedno mi je, vi znate što je mekše kad se skuha, za juhu je.
Aaaaa, evo je! Evo onih meni najdražih kupaca – odjednom gnjev prokulja iz Martina, nestade negdje onaj osmjeh s okruglog mladog lica. Stojim sa košarom. Grozničavo razmišljam čime sam ga naljutila. S onim da bude mekano?
Vi bi za juhu, je li? – sve je gnjevniji Martin.
Ti su mi najdraži! Dođe mi na primjer žena i kaže: „Dajte mi nešto za šug.“ Prvo, ja ne znam što je šug. Ja nisam odavde i ne znam što je šug. Recite na hrvatskom. Drugo, nikad u životu nisam pojeo ni jednu vrstu mesa osim svinjetine i piletine. Ma skoro samo svinjetinu. Nikada te neke junetine, teletine, ovo, ono… I kako da ja vaše prohtjeve riješim? Vi bi mekano, ona druga bi za „šug“, a sve junetina. Šta ja znam šta je mekano. Šta ja znam šta je za šug. A kad pitam hoćete li vrat, šutite. Što šutite? – izlila se iz mladog Martina (Slavonca?) ljutnja na prohtjeve Dalmatinke pred njegovim mesarskim pultom.
Stojim ukopano. Iz Martina bujica riječi, a iz mene ni riječ da izađe. Pretvorih se u krajnju skrušenost i poniženje zbog neznanja dijelova zaklane junadi porazbacane ispred mene na mesarskom pultu. Najradije bih nestala. No ta opcija podrazumijeva da ostajem bez mesa za ručak. Mekanog. Za juhu…
- Može onda od vrata… kilo… - neki eho mog glasa je dozujao do Martina, na čijem su se širokom licu tada opustili napeti mišići.
Eto, mogli ste odmah reći – zaključio je najljubazniji mesar na svijetu koji jede samo svinje.
Martin u Zadar, Martin iz Zadra. Ne ostavlja dojam da će naučiti dijelove juneta. Ni teleta. Ni što je šug. Zašto bi mesar uopće to trebao znati?!
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19. svibanj 2024 15:49
